


Life In Pieces

by 4eyesBarbie



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: BB-8 Ships It, Background Character Death, Character Study, Force-Sensitive Finn (Star Wars), Gay Poe Dameron, M/M, Mentioned Luke Skywalker, Non-Graphic Smut, POV Poe Dameron, Post-Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-24
Updated: 2020-01-24
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:34:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22388023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/4eyesBarbie/pseuds/4eyesBarbie
Summary: Poe Dameron is unprepared.A study of the thoughts and feelings of the Resistance pilot come General in a selection of scenes from the sequel trilogy from The Force Awakens, through The Last Jedi, to The Rise of Skywalker, before and beyond.
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Finn, Poe Dameron/Muran
Comments: 4
Kudos: 54





	Life In Pieces

**Author's Note:**

> None of the Star Wars franchise belong to me in any way.
> 
> (But if JK Rowling has taught us anything it is that fandoms belong to the fans).
> 
> This is my first fanfic in about 18 years.  
> English is not my first language.  
> I have done zero research for this, it is all based on memory and headcanons.  
> Yes, there is smut.  
> This has not been proof read.
> 
> For Nikki.
> 
> ...

The first time comes as a surprise, out of left field. He's unprepared, and it knocks him for six.

It must show on his face, because it feels like he's been kicked in the chest, but if it does, then Finn doesn't seem to notice.

"Where's Rey?"

It turns what feels like his entire world upside down, and he's unprepared; like he's lost his footing, only to find it just in time to run head first into a wall.

BB-8 catches up to them now, beeping happily. The spring of joy that bubbled up in Poe's chest when he realised what the little droid was saying - Finn, naked, bag, leaking - has gone ice cold, and he was unprepared.

"Where's Rey?"

He remembers to breathe, suddenly, and force-reboots his mind. Rey was gone, before Finn woke up. She waited, but she had to leave. They were running out of time; they still are, and Finn is looking at him with eyes that are saying 'tell me everything, don't dare try to protect me, tell me  _ everything _ '.

And so, with BB-8 continuing to beep happily at their heels, Poe leads the young man straight to the General.

His friend is awake; alive and awake, and Poe realises that he'd hoped he'd be happier to see him. He's unprepared, and it knocks him for six. 

\---

The second time comes shortly thereafter.

Everything is happening too fast and Poe is not keeping up. He's losing control of his fleet, and nobody seems to hear him. He's slipping.

He can feel himself coming apart at the seams when lieutenant Connix comes marching onto the bridge and whispers, urgently, between breaths, that

"Finn has a plan."

_ Finn _ . 

He walks in, and Poe can feel himself exhale, like he had forgotten how, until now, but he is unprepared, as behind Finn, a second person enters the room, and Poe finds himself unable to take another breath as Finn starts talking.

He can't concentrate on what his friend is saying. His eyes are drawn to the young woman by his side; a mechanic, Paige's sister, if he's not mistaken.

"Okay! ...Say that again, slowly this time?"

Finn looks exasperated. He pushes off the com desk he's been leaning on and sighs in annoyance, turning away from Poe. He is flailing. They need more time, they need more ships, they need more people - they need Rey and they need Luke Skywalker - Fine, he gives them the go-ahead.

The presence of Rose Tico feels overbearing, and it makes him angry, something for which he is thoroughly unprepared, and it knocks him for six. Finn is leaving, the General is not waking up, and  _ no one is listening to him! _

"How did you two meet, anyway?"

Finn doesn't answer, but she does

"Just luck"

she says; her voice is serene and mysterious,  _ knowing _ . His stomach is on fire.

"Yeah?"

The word hangs in the air for a fraction of a second while he schools his voice into something that he thinks is neutral. 

"Good luck..?"

It's not neutral, he doesn't think, but none of the others seem to notice, or if they do, they don't let it show.

\---

BB-8 chirps quietly beside him, gently rolling their round body against his boot-clad foot. He gives a little hum, reaching down to stroke the chipped surface of the little droid's dome head.

He's deep in thought, reading the top sentence of a scathing loss-report, over and over again, and watching Finn over the top of the holo-pad.

The fire in his stomach has gone cold again, and has been replaced by what feels like the rocks Rey lifted off them on Crait.

He's not sure when Finn took his hand, and the air rushed in between the levitating stones. But he knows exactly the moment he let him go, and the ground dropped from underneath him, and he lost his footing. He was unprepared for the sensation of falling, he was unprepared for the motion-sickness of it, and it knocked him for six.

The red saltrock is far behind them now, but the salt of it still sting in his eyes.

Nobody's coming to help them. All they have is the young woman from Jakku, and this ship. She looks frail, breakable, delicate; the last Jedi, with the weight of the Resistance on her thin shoulders, but the fire in her eyes is unmistakable - she is strength made flesh. 

He can see why Finn is drawn to her. And for a moment he thought he saw his own dizzying insecurity replicated on her face as their brave soldier ran to the side of the beautiful mechanic come resistance fighter.

Rose Tico lay lifeless on a bunk on the Falcon, and Finn hasn't left her side. 

BB-8 rolls over to where Rey is sleeping; curled up on a seat nuzzled against a softly snoring Chewbacca, and beeps inquisitively, but moves on when their chatter illicit no response, with an affronted trill, directed to the room in general, their body clunking over the metal floor.

\---

Finn has a  _ thing _ about holding hands. Whenever they meet up, every time they part ways, he takes Poe's hand and squeezes it in his own, holds it for a moment, and looks him square in the eye, unwavering, like he wants to make sure Poe is still there, that this is real, 

" _ We're gonna do this," _

this is happening. A small satisfied smile on his face, that Poe can't help but return, echoing the smile he gave the young man the day he returned his droid, and his jacket, to him and completed his mission. 

" _ You're a good man, Finn. _ "

He knew that the first time he saw him, and he knows it now, despite everything. Because of everything. 

Maybe someday someone will hear their call for help and come. Maybe soon. Maybe never.

Rebellions are built on hope. But he doesn't want to run forever. They've all spent so much of their lives running, fighting.

\---

Rey drops a tree on BB-8 and Poe crashes the Falcon. He sits under a canopy in the makeshift base camp, carefully detaching the dented paneling; holds it up to the light, inspecting the buckled metal. Spherical is a difficult shape to maintain.

BB-8 turns their lens towards the piece Poe is holding and gives a morose whine.

"Nah, it's no big deal, buddy. Papa Poe will fix it in no time."

The little BB-unit squeals happily, excitedly rocking in place as to not get forest muck in their machinery. Poe smiles at them and gives his buddy a reassuring pat.

He's glad for a moment alone. Finn has made it explicitly clear that he wants Poe out of the way - he wants to talk to Rey alone, and Poe is getting tired of feeling like the third wheel - so he takes a small round-headed hammer out of his satchel and starts to knock the dents out of the astromech panels, one by one, checking their shape with every couple of knocks.

BB-8 trills soothingly next to him, attempting to mimic the birdsong coming from the surrounding forest, confident in Poe's ability to sufficiently restore their panels.

\---

Zorii reminds him of Muran, and he's unprepared for that, after all this time. He hasn't thought about her in a very long time, hasn't thought of their little side-gig since he so unceremoniously left the Republic Navy. 

But he's adept at playing the part of the last of the famous intergalactic playboys, so this time he doesn't slip. He flirts, nonchalantly, as does she, and it feels good to be on familiar ground, suddenly. He's glad to see her, and he wishes his friends weren't here, that they weren't in imminent danger; that they could meet, and eat, and talk. 

Muran was the only one of his academy classmates who'd met her. None of them bring him back for Poe like Zorrii does. Her voice sounds like he smelled, somehow, and he's unprepared, and that does almost knock him for six. He wonders briefly if she notices, when she takes her visar off and looks him in the eye for the first time, but if she does, she doesn't say as much.

"Can I kiss you?"

He jokes, and, as she shakes her head ever so slightly, he can see in her eyes that the smile she gives him is humorously reproachful, like she can see right through him. And it frightens him.

\---

As soon as her astromech releases the flight harness, she launches out of the x-wing's cockpit, boots landing hard on the deck, and stumbles into a sprint.

She reaches Poe, just as he shakily sets foot on the floor himself, and without attempting to slow down she throws her arms around his neck. 

"Jess…!"

The breath he's been holding all throughout landing is knocked out of him as he lands hard on the metal floor, with Jessika Pava in his arms, on top of him.

"We did it…"

He whispers; tears starting to burn in his eyes.

"Snap..!"

she starts, but he interrupts her.

"I know, Testor."

They lay there for several moments, clutching at each other's flight suits, and breathing; artificially recycled, life-giving air. 

It's a celebration, and it's a terrible personal loss. They ache, in shared silence. They've been here together before, many times; after Muran, after Lulo, after Iolo… Into his hair he can hear her whisper, almost inaudibly, 

"Poor Karé… Poor babies…!"

They don't try to hold the tears back now; they can finally grieve now.

It's over.

\---

_ Muran combs his fingers through his hair. He smiles, without opening his eyes, but he thinks his boyfriend is smiling too. _

_ It's so nice… it causes a pleasant shiver to run down his spine, making the hair on his arms and the back of his neck stand up. Involuntarily, he gives a little shake, letting out a delighted squeak. _

_ It makes Muran snort a silent laugh out of his nose, his breath tickling in Poe's ear. _

_ Squealing, for real this time, Poe jerks the covers up over his head, folding over on himself to protect his affronted ear, furiously scratching it with a finger. _

_ "You bastard! Kriff that tickles!" _

_ Muran laughs out loud - all delight, no remorse - and pushes at the bundle that is Poe.  _

_ "Come out of there, then, and let me kiss it better!" _

_ "Idiot! Keep your mouth away from my ears!" _

_ Poe scrambles to free himself of the covers, as Muran pushes harder on his bundle-fort, threatening to push it out of the bed, its occupant and all. _

_ "I'll get you for that!" _

_ He emerges from the covers, finally, and throws his full weight onto Muran, who "huff"s at the impact, but pinns Poe's arms at his sides with an embrace. The two young men look at each other then; Poe's long hair has come loose from its tie and it's sticking to his sleep-rosy face in places, Muran's stubble has started resembling a proper beard over the last few days they've been holed up on the ranch on Yavin IV. _

_ He reaches up, brushing the hair out of Poe's face with both hands, then hoisting him up his torso so that their faces are level with each other. _

_ "You're beautiful, Poe Dameron." _

_ He lifts his head off the pillow, capturing Poe's lips in a lazy kiss, which the smaller man returns, eagerly opening his mouth, deepening the kiss. He moans pleasurably into Muran's mouth as the latter wraps his arms around him, splaying his hands across the planes of his back, pressing their bodies together, playfully rolling his hips… _

_ "... I love you…!" _

\---

"... Poe..!"

He's not dreamt about Muran like this since before the accident. He's unprepared, and it knocks him for six.

After it happened, all he could see in his dreams was a ball of fire, all he could hear was the crackle as the comm link cut out for the last time.

Running into Zorii Bliss must have unearthed a treasure trove of precious memories. 

Suddenly sitting bolt upright, he draws a breath like he's just emerged from under water.

Gulping for air, he looks around the tent, half expecting to see his father, peeking in through his bedroom door, careful not to peek, calling two young marines up for spring break breakfast. 

"Poe…!"

He whips around, then, only to find himself, indeed, on his camping bed, in the tent at their temporary Resistance base, looking straight into the dark eyes of his friend, Finn.

\---

Rey is gone. This time Finn is not worried. He's not pacing the ship, or staring silently into space, as it stretches out in front of them; he's sitting in the co-pilot's seat, browsing files on a holo-pad with enthusiastic interest.

Around his neck, fitted into a cage, of sorts, made from steel wire, rests a gleaming gem - a kyber crystal.

Poe watches him through the corner of his eye. A pre-programmed sensor starts beeping on the dashboard in front of them, flashing blue. Finn looks up from the holo-pad, watching the viewing window expectantly, as Poe presses the sensor and pulls the lever to take them out of hyperspace, flicking switches over to manual control. Space stabilizes around them, bringing the Yavin system into view.

He sets the coordinates from memory and flicks on the comms, opening a channel to the spaceport to clear them for landing.

He turns to Finn to say… something, but the words die on his tongue, because he is met by a blazing smile. He's unprepared for it, and it knocks him for six.

Finn claps a hand on his knee, then, squeezing it heartily, before turning back to the window and the approaching world;

"So, this is home, then?"

Poe doesn't take his eyes off the young General - he feels dizzy as he answers quietly;

"Yeah. This is home."

\---

The grass is soft and cool under their bare feet. Dew drops from the night before still glisten in the early sunshine and stick to the bottom of their trouser legs, turning the light linen fabric darker shades of blue and grey.

The large tree at the edge of the clearing is stretching its branches out over the little ranch house, keeping the worst of the sun off the corrugated metal roof at midday, and shielding it from the elements.

Underneath the tree, Poe grabs Finn's forearm, stopping them both mid-step, pointing up towards the leafy parasol overhead.

"Look."

The tree is glistening too, against the morning sky, as if submerged in clear water, shimmering.

Finn stands silently for a moment, looking upwards, taking in the display. 

"The Force?"

Poe nods, hand still resting on the younger man's arm, eyes trained on the majestic canopy.

Finn stirs next to him, fishing the kyber crystal out of the collar of his tunic, inspecting it briefly before starting towards the trunk of the tree. In doing so, moving his wrist around Poe's hand and taking it his own, effectively ushering him along.

Touching the hand holding the crystal to the tree, Finn closes his eyes, breathing in deeply. Poe doesn't dare make any kind of movement, lest he break the spell which is keeping his hand in Finn's, still. He hardly dare breathe. He's not prepared. He could swear their joined hands are getting warmer.

"Can you feel it too..?"

Finn asks, almost in a whisper. Poe thinks he can, and he says as much, just loud enough that Finn can hear him, and the young man smiles widely in response.

He is beautiful. His dark skin glow in the bright summer light, his wide hands are warm; he's tall and he's broad, but he's so gentle, and his smile is so bright… Poe returns it again, and it feels like they stand there for an eternity, hand in hand, smiling brightly, under the Force tree.

He doesn't know if it's the familiarity of being home, the solid earth under his feet, or the Force itself that gives him the confidence, but he gives Finn's hand a squeeze and takes half a step in closer. When Finn doesn't draw away from him, he sways ever so slightly on the spot, testing the waters as he takes the full step into the younger man's space.

They're close enough now that they're breathing the same air; mouths slack, eyes half-lidded, chests rising, falling, rising…

Finn swallows, lowering his face, touching their foreheads together.

Poe licks his lips, looking up at him through dark lashes, nuzzling his nose, just about. 

He breaths, almost inaudibly,

"Can I kiss you..?"

\---

The sharp bark of the Force tree digs into his back through the light tunic when Finn spins them around, pushing him up against the tree-trunk, and knocking their teeth together in the process. But the only protest he's willing to muster up is a moan, deep in his throat, which Finn takes as the encouragement it actually is, and without breaking the kiss he's undone the ties of Poe's tunic, his fingertips ghosting lightly over the older man's torso, making him shiver; making his knees weak. 

As Poe shrugs his tunic off Finn pulls his own tunic over his head, Poe grabs it out of his hands and tosses it into the grass - the two men moving in synchronised frenzy - arms wrapping around each other, hands roaming desperately, fingers digging into firm flesh, tugging at hair and linen - until they've both had enough of fighting for dominance, and Poe, arching his back off the tree for leverage, hoists himself off the ground, wrapping his legs around Finn's hips.

The latter loses his balance then, and they tumble to the ground. The grass is still wet in the shade of the tree, and cold against Poe's back, but he can hardly feel it. However, the sudden change of posture have woken them out of their frenzied haze.

Foreheads touching, they just lay there for a moment, breathing heavily, looking at each other.

Finn breaks the silence,

"I was not prepared for that."

"...Are you ok..?"

"Yeah!"

He smiles down at Poe; his cheeks are flushed, eyes bright, full lips red from their heated kiss.

"Can we do that again?"

Too elated to speak, Poe's answer is just a face-splitting smile, and the half a nod he manages before Finn has cupped the back of his neck and pulled him in for another searing kiss; his other hand wedged underneath the pilot's back, running it down over his ass, grabbing, hoisting them both up into a sitting position, Poe's legs still wrapped around his waist.

Their thin linen trousers provide barely a barrier between them, and every movement from either of them have their erections sliding together, trapped between their writhing bodies, causing them to buck helplessly against each other, seeking friction.

Shivering, Poe wraps his arms around Finn's neck, using the leverage fuck his hips harder against him, drawing moan after delicious moan from the other man's mouth.

"...Finn…"

he whimpers, digging his fingertips into the skin of the young man's shoulders. Finn almost growls in response, grabbing Poe's ass with both hands, grinding his hips on his own.

"...Finn!"

Needily moaning his name - Poe's flailing, uncommunicative way of letting him know that he's close - seem to push Finn over the edge; and as the waves of climactic pleasure roll through him, in a moment of brilliant divination, he grabs a fistfull of hair at the back of Poe's head, yanking it firmly backwards, breathily moaning his co-General's name,

"... _ Poe _ !"

releasing Poe's own orgasm, and with it, a slew of tortured gasps and groans.

\---

\---

BB-8 shoots through the open door, past the old man where he sits, sipping a mug of sweet, cold tea; they bounce off the front steps, spraying dirt and gravel as they land, hard, in the yard in front of the little ranch house.

Kes Dameron covers his face with his arm at the onslaught, swearing under his breath, and calls out,

"Oi! The kriff got into you!?"

A query that seems to be shared by his son and his paramour, as they both appear in the door behind him not a moment later.

Finn asks,

"What's up with BB?"

"Beats me.."

Kes answers, and takes a contemplative sip of tea. The two Generals look at each other and shrug. 

"Should I go after them..?"

Poe wonders but, just then, Finn takes a sharp intake of breath and grows still; like a prey animal which has spotted a raptor.

Poe's insides go cold in an instant, and for a split second he expects the spectre of Ben Solo - masked, caped and hooded, wielding his terrifying weapon - to appear at the edge of the forest, but before he's had time to react to that sinking feeling, a beaming smile splits his lover's face as he bursts out

"REY!"

At that moment she steps out of the shade and into the clearing, clad in linen robes the colour of Tatooine's sands, BB-8 circling around her, her knapsack levitating a few feet behind her.

Seeing the three men on the porch, she walks faster, and when Finn takes off running, so does she.

The pair reach each other midway between the house and the surrounding forest and Finn scoops the young Jedi into his arms, spinning her around as BB-8 ducks her soaring feet, chirping happily.

"Finn!"

Her whole face is beaming with joy.

"Poe!"

As he reaches them, Finn sets her down, and she pulls him into their embrace.

Finn mumbles contentedly into her hair,

"I've missed you.  _ We _ have missed you! Tell us everything, Rey."

"You lads better peel more vegetables if she's staying for dinner!"

Kes hollars from the porch; an amused smirk on his face, betraying his attempt at harsh exterior, answered by a gleeful squeal from the little droid, who sets off back towards the house.

As the three friends approach, the old man levers himself off his deckchair with a walking stick and steps gingerly out to greet the new guest, stretching out a calloused hand towards her,

"Welcome to Yavin IV, young lady, I've heard so much about you, all good things of course, from The Generals here".

Rey, smile undying, takes offered hand and shakes it.

"It's nice to meet you, Sir. I'm Rey Skywalker".


End file.
